Tue. July 1
I keep going back and forth. I was certainly satisfied with the way I look several days in the morning these last few weeks. Then I hear myself saying but I need to do more to get totally lean, but then I obviously don't care enough because I eat and drink inappropriately!!! I find myself obsessing about eating (wanting to that is!), and how many more calories can I burn and then I just don't care and want to have fun. My one sister and neice pointed this out to me---that is what they were saying to me from the beginning; that the extreme effort isn't worth it.
Had a great conversation with my client S. the other morning about this. What is the goal for what we are doing? I could for example just take a bunch of diet pills for a few days, take a picture and say ok-done! So I am finding out that for me to be leaner than I have gotten to is not worth it for me....sometimes I feel I am saying that because I failed-that maybe I can't do any better but that is part of goal setting, and re-evaluating; this is what I talk to my clients about exactly----what do you want, and then keep asking yourself it is still worth it.....do you still want it. My biggest thing was to see what it would take to get really lean in my midsection and it SUCKS!!!! What it takes is not having fun the way I want, and working out for the sake of working out instead of what I love. I caught myself thinking I shouldn't go on a long bike ride because I wouldn't burn as many calories as compared with going to the gym and working really hard on the cardio machines (from where I live it takes awhile to get to places where you can ride without a lot of traffic). That is not what I want! One of my clients said because I am skinny everywhere else, and just store my body fat so unevenly that I will look anorexic all over when my midsection is really cut, and I am one of those people that should do lip suction!!!!!
Anyway, the last pictures I posted are ones I am happy with. I have period bloat right now and so will take more when I look good.
We are going to north Dakota for the 4th tomorrow and I decided several weeks ago that I would officially end this before we leave, and that is where I am. I will try to be good there though and see if I can get more good pictures before the 11th----but they love cheese so much there! And bread! And pizza! And beer! Stay tuned. I won’t post until I get back because there is no internet at the lake cabin where we will be!!